Have you ever wanted to do kinky stuff on the big screen as audiences look on? Are you a porn-making hobbyist? It’s time to grab your camera and get kinky, as Dan Savages’ Hump! film festival is looking for submissions for its annual celebration of DIY cinematic sex.

Actually, the sex doesn’t even need to be kinky, as the film fest welcomes just about anything sexual, be it vanilla, hetero, trans, fetish, gender-queer orgies — whatever. There can be plot, or you can just go with straight-up fucking. The only no-nos are: no kids, no animals, and no poop.

This year, film curators are also encouraging a few specific props, so those looking to get a little more creative should try to work in hula hoops or Mike Huckabee’s book, God, Guns, Grits, and Gravy, for an extra “thumb’s up” from organizers.

There are two other things to know about the fest: There will be money for those who make it through submissions, and videos are fiercely kept private. Meaning, these flicks, topping out at five minutes maximum, will never make their way online. The only people who will see these films are the festival curators and live audiences. So your super unsexy job is safe regardless of your extracurricular activities.

As for the money, prizes will be awarded via audience ballot for those who make the best humor, sex, kink, and overall best flicks. All filmmakers included will also receive a cut of ticket sales. So you’re getting paid no matter what.

For more details and to submit your smut, visit the event’s official page. The 2015 Hump festival will be coming to St. Anthony Main for three days filled with fun October 1-3. You can buy tickets here.

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