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XBIZ Uses Sorcery And Chanting To Divine Male Clip Artist Noms #Fuckery

One time someone at AVN called me to ask a question about a female performer. After I answered I asked him why he wanted to know? He told me he was working on the pre-nom submissions. I was like, wait, you guys actually watch movies and scenes?  He replied, yeah,  part of the research.

Poor guy, little did he know there’s an easier way…

The XBIZ formula seems a little easier.

Step one, has said person ever sucked an XBIZ dick, posed nude for an XBIZ employee, or been an XBIZ source? If so, you get a nom…

Now this tried and true method only works on the ladies.

So Helmy got together with his fake mafiosi crew and came up a new way, they danced around chanting at the sun while watching the movie Shrek on their iPhone 5S’s.

Check out what they came up with. Here’s a list of the clip artist names with their MV rank:

Best Male Clip Artist

Brock Cooper 32

Sam Shock 61

Isiah Maxwell 44

Oliver Davis 63

Gee TRPWL, that seems legit.

—->Johnny Goodluck 205 <—–

Yes Johnny Goodluck with a ranking of 205 somehow is in the running for Best Male Clip Artist. There are several guys ranked higher than him, including Rising Clip Artist, Indiana Bones.

Rising Clip Artist

Indiana Bones 53

Vinnie 203

Erik Todd 478

Explain to me how Indiana Bones who is ranked #53 (and consistently in the top 60 for two years) only qualifies as a Rising Clip Artist but the local porn mope wanna be biker with a #200+ ranking qualifies for Best Male Clip Artist?

Brock Doom is ranked 130, where’s his nom? Who the hell is Brock Doom anyway, but still.  You mean to tell me Erik Todd is more worthy than Brock Doom? Even worse, XBIZ put Vinnie O’Neil and Erik Todd in the same category as Indiana Bones, one of the more popular guys in adult.  Talk about a slap in the face.

A quick ManyVids name search reveals at least 8 guys with higher rankings that Eric Todd, Vinnie and Johnny Goodluck. None of them got a nom. People like Boston Brawler,  Owen Gray, Stirling Cooper, JackRipherxxx, Rome Major, JMac, Sgt Miles and Jay Smooth. There’s a lot  more, but baseball is coming back.

This is beyond absurd.

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View Comments (2)

  • You overlooked the obvious answer:

    XBIZ isn't looking at ManyVids rankings al all, because greedy fuck Alec Helmy had a falling out with MV.

    Translation: XBIZ is no longer getting big $ from MV, so no more promo for MV producers.

    BTW, the totality of the XBIZ nominating (and awards-giving) crew is Alec and Alejandro. Helmy doesn't know who ANY of these performers and clip/cam artists are. And Alejandro knows the ones who date him (until they jump off a fucking roof).

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