So I sit down on the toilet and start going thru my emails, deleting most based on title alone, but one catches my eye. It’s a link from XBIZ. I click it, and immediately see this face:

That my friends is the face of Evil.

I get that times are tough, we all need free content, but having the biggest bitch in the PR game write for you is the equivalent of Betty Crocker letting Tucker Slain write up his favorite roofie recipe, or James Bartholet writing sexual assault laws for LA County. To quote Dale Doback after the bunk bed incident, “It was a terrible idea.”

Lets just hope there was no sex involved in this article exchange.

And to show there’s no hard feelings, TRPWL is gonna do our part, and promote this piece.

How to Know When It’s Time to Get a Publicist

is the title, seems like a well SEO’d title. I’ll take the bullet points of Shrek’s post, and break them down using things Shrek’s done in the past.

Erika starts off with:

“You’re Serious About Your Brand, Image”

When your publicist isn’t serious about HER own brand or IMAGE, how can she be serious about yours?

With close to 60 EX Clients that are still around, go ask 5 of them what they think of her. Trust me when I say, 4 of the 5 will take a burrito sized shit on her.

 

Standing Out in the Crowd

If there’s one thing Erika can do, its make you stand out in the crowd. Just hiring her puts a bullseye on your head, that’s how much she’s hated.

Let me give you an example. Say a Brian Gross client started peeing on the customers at the local Starbucks.  The TRPWL headline would read:

“Fringe Performer With Bladder Issues Pees In A Mocha Frappuccino”

Now, same situation, only it’s an Erika client:

“Erika Icon Client Johnny Goodluck Pees All Over Women And Children, Then Steals Brownie For His Publicist”

Remember wise people, according to Erika, its all about who you know.

 

Publicists Need Things to Publicize

What she means by this is, she’s gonna charge 500/750 per month (or more) even if you have no fresh scenes. Erika is notorious for PR’ing a scene that came out 6 months ago, because to her, it’s all about getting paid. It doesn’t matter if that content has already reached its potential, she’s got bills and your money is how she pays them.

Keep in mind, Erika has ZERO publicist friends. She beefs with everyone, and sometimes, she puts out a PR weeks before the scene hits. That’s done preemptively, to keep company writers from promoting a scene featuring her client. If they put out a company PR, promoting you, she runs the risk of not getting paid. A PR for a scene that’s weeks away from going live, does the performer absolutely NO good. By the time the scene hits, your name is out of the news cycle.

Erika’s agency couldn’t care less about how things play out for you, as long as she’s getting paid.

 

Who You Know Is Everything

Erika once claimed that she could have people banned from Exxxotica. The Exxxotica reps said otherwise

As a reason to hire her, Erika claims very few people can do AVN/XBIZ noms. FACT CHECK:  Just about anyone connected to adult can do them.

Erika claims to have the hook up on podcasts. It’s true, the guy who owns DemonSeed (with their 4 listeners) works for her. LOL That’s the hook up.

Erika claims that she is an in-house writer for Hustler, which is a lie according to Hustler.

Maybe XBIZ should change this one to “It’s not who you know, but what you can lie about.”

 

Taming Social MediaFrom an Erika blog. Only problem is, she requires log in for most, if not all her clients.

Does promoting your clients escorting count as “Taming Social Media”

 

 

Damage Control for Fixing Social Media Blunders, Misconceptions and Bad Situations

After Vice ran a story about Erika’s Client, she tweeted this:

Obviously she didn’t read the story. lol

Nice spin Shrek!

“You see, after I swallowed, an intense burning filled my throat. My throat felt itchy—like acid was trapped in my trachea—and then I coughed. The pill made me gag several more times and then thick saliva—or partially more cum—shot up my throat.

I lied on the floor, worrying I was having an allergic reaction to sperm like that chick from XoJane. The idea of an ER visit made me more nauseous, because I’d have to explain that I had eaten my own cum. Instead, I took a shower to calm down. Several minutes later, my sore throat started to die down.

The pill forced me to spit when I wanted to swallow. That’s fucked up, but I’m not sure what’s worse: gagging on cum that tastes like a bloomin’ onion or gagging on cum that tastes like blueberries? Oprah chai tea made my jizz both delicious and easy to digest, but I’m way too broke to drink a Starbucks tea every time I bust a nut. It seems like no matter what, cum is going to leave a bad taste in my mouth.”

Read the full Vice story here

Does trying to bullying someone into signing a NDA count as Damage control?

 

There are many reasons to acquire PR, but having the money to be able to pay for it is crucial. Stellar publicists aren’t cheap or free

Yes, and when you can’t afford Erika anymore or don’t want to keep using her she:

A. Tells you to start Hooking

B. Says she’s gonna have you blackballed by the industry and blackmails you

C. Writes a fake blog about you having Herpes

D. Trashes you to anyone who will listen

E. Tells her hairdresser she works for AVN

F. Tries to get your agent to drop you

G. Lies and says Brian Gross charges his clients 10,000 per month

H. Tells you you’re locked into a contract and she’ll sue you, even though the contract is unenforceable garbage.

I. All Of The Above

The answer is I.

She has done all of those things.

I dont care who you hire, as long as it’s NOT her.