Armie Hammer clearly is comfortable enough now with Playboy to open up about his sex life in their July/August issue, but it turns out he’s been a fan of the mag since he was a kid!
“I almost got kicked out of eighth grade for selling Playboy,” the 26-year-old star of The Lone Ranger said. “Me and this guy had a ring where we’d bring magazines packaged with a bottle of lotion to school and sell them to the kids for $20.”
But this secret operation couldn’t go undetected forever. Armie explained he “got called into a teacher’s office. He said, ‘I’ve heard you’re bringing in these nudie magazines.'”
Like most middle-school kids, he went with a straight denial. “I said, ‘Nope, not me,'” he recalled. “He went, ‘So you wouldn’t mind if we checked your locker?’ Which he then went and did. We’d stashed the actual magazines in bushes by the school, but there was a ton of lotion in the locker. All he could say was, ‘Why do you have so much lotion?’ I said, ‘I get dry hands.'”
Perfectly logical explanation. And this early entrepreneurship of R-rated material clearly gave Armie some sexual confidence for later in life. So much so, in fact, that on his very first date with now-wife Elizabeth Chambers, he was fine with things taking a pretty dirty turn.
“My wife and I were supposed to go skeet shooting on our first date, but it started to rain so we ended up going to a bunch of art galleries and then a porno store instead,” he said. The duo wed in 2010, so clearly, this worked out OK for Armie.
That said, he has toned things down a bit in the boudoir. “I don’t know how much we can put here without my parents being embarrassed, but I used to like to be a dominant lover,” he said. (Sorry, Mom and Dad!) “I liked the grabbing of the neck and the hair and all that. But then you get married and your sexual appetites change. And I mean that for the better—it’s not like I’m suffering in any way. But you can’t really pull your wife’s hair. It gets to a point where you say, ‘I respect you too much to do these things that I kind of want to do.'”
Another form of domination Armie isn’t up for? Playing the role of Christian Grey in the movie version of Fifty Shades of Grey. “No one actually offered me the movie, but while I was working on Lone Ranger my agent brought it up, and I said, “Nope,'” he said. “I mean come on—it’s just mommy porn. I’m not going to sit on top of the laundry machine in spin cycle reading about putting a ball gag in someone’s mouth. That doesn’t do it for me.”
Well, we all have our hard limits.
