James Deen is a man of many accomplishments, but he’s most famous for being a porn star. Recently, however, he’s also been working on an online food show called James Deen Loves Food, regularly blogging at his very NSFW website, and starred opposite Lindsay Lohan in The Canyons, a super indie-movie directed by Paul Schrader (writer of Taxi Driver) and written by Bret Easton Ellis (author of American Psycho) that should be released some time this summer. Deen is also a man who knows how to eat a good breakfast, has a healthy love of burritos, and “always said [he] would be a food critic if porn didn’t work out.”
I usually wake up at 6 a.m., then I go down to make coffee while I’m looking at my phone, dealing with texts, emails–things I got while I was sleeping. After the pot is done, I bring a cup of coffee upstairs to my girlfriend and put it on the bedside table with something on top of it so the cat doesn’t get into it. That way she can have coffee when she gets up.
Then I’m downstairs to my office by 6:15 at the latest, and I start working. That way I have time to write some blogs, and then around 9 a.m., when everyone’s in the office, my phone explodes, and I deal with that until I have to do a scene.
The average call time is around 11 a.m., but really anywhere between 10 a.m. and 2 p.m. I deal with the emails, run, shower, get ready, and then I’m on set.
Oh and I eat. I totally eat! I forgot about that. During the email explosion around 9 a.m., I realize “Oh wow, I’m hungry, I need to eat.” So I go to the fridge and get yogurt, various cheeses, and various types of meat–salami, pancetta, stuff like that–a granola bar, maybe an apple. I prefer coffee yogurt or vanilla or any of the berries. I try to avoid the banana or coconut yogurts or the weird ones, like strawberry cheesecake delight.
I used to not eat breakfast when I was 18 or 19 years old. I would sleep as late as I could and stay up as late as I could. I had a lot of different [priorities] in my life then, and I wasn’t working as much.
Around when I was 20 or so, I ended up going to France for a job. France has the best food in the world–I love everything about France. And one of the things that I got there was this complimentary breakfast. I woke up jet-lagged, and thought it would be bagels and OJ and a pot of coffee, but it wasn’t. It was this huge spread of the most amazing, most fantastic food I’d seen in my life: 25 types of cured meats and 25 types of cheese, and a million different types of yogurt, and fancy stuff that comes in glass jars, and multiple types of juices, and anything you can imagine that’s breakfast-related. It was an amazing, amazing spread of food. So every day I was up at 6 a.m., running downstairs just so I could eat. Then I got back to America, and I guess that French idea of a European-style breakfast stuck with me.
I always said that I would be a food critic if porn didn’t work out for me. But I never wanted to write anything–I’m not a good writer–so I could never take it seriously. With the show, James Deen Loves Food, I can be as silly as I want and review foods and restaurants I want. I’ve done some that are really goofy, like ordering everything at Burger King, but also more serious ones like the Malibu Cafe.
As far as fast food goes, I like Carl’s Jr. and Jack in the Box. If someone’s rude at a fast food place, I will never go there again. Like at Taco Bell. I used to love it, but then I had a negative customer service experience and it was like “f**k you, I’m going to Del Taco!” And now I’m Del Taco through and through.
I used to eat burritos every day. There’s this place called Hugo’s Tacos on Coldwater and Riverside in the valley, and it’s just so good. They have this honey chipotle hot sauce, and it is the best thing that I have ever eaten in my life. They’re trying to do organic burrito stuff, with vegan options and all that hipster crap, but it’s really just a great burrito.
I got obsessed, and whenever I was nearby would go to Hugo’s and stockpile burritos. I would get three of them and put them in the fridge, so they would always be there, for a midnight snack. But that got old, and now I have a normal amount of burritos.
They just opened a location right down the street from my house, which I’m a little nervous about, because now I have these stomach problems–my doctor wants me to eat healthier, less fast food, keep cheeseburgers to a minimum–so it’s going to be difficult. Self control, and all.
I don’t drink much, but I do really like wine and used to have a collection. I love the science of wine, how it all works, and how grapes from the same place can taste completely different. My problem, though, is that I don’t like to waste it. If I open it up and only have a glass, it’ll go bad because I don’t drink that often. So I end up killing a bottle of wine all alone, and then I’m drunk, and that’s not fun.
Italian wines drive me insane. I’m always guessing with everything I’m doing with them, and when I get it right, I get so proud of myself, and think “I know what I’m doing! Yes! I’m right, I’m right!” Italy just has such an old culture of wine, and the naming system is all over the place, and wines that seem to have the same name can taste totally different.
France is complex, too, but it’s easier because they’re purists. They’re very specific about the region–no confusion–so it’s just discovering what does what, what years do what, and then you have a good idea of what’s going on.
I tried to get into beer, but I don’t really like it that much. Oatmeal stouts and London porters are the only ones I really like, like Old Rasputin from North Coast Brewing. When it comes to spirits, I like to use cocktails to enhance my experience–if I’m in a pool in Vegas on a summer day, I want a mojito, or hanging out with friends at a Mexican restaurant, I’ll have a margarita, or if I’m hanging out I’ll just have a glass of scotch.
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