The First Ever XPT Awards, for unique categories and great Bushes

Dec 20, 2012
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It’s that time of the year again. A time when who ever spends the most money gets the best awards..Luckily for the real porn fan there are a few awards that can’t be bought. Of course the best bush award of 2012. Voting will start on that Jan 1 and run thru AVN. The best bush winner will get their award at AVN. Most likely not on the red carpet but in a hotel room. The winning bush must be inspected to make sure it doesn’t contain any extensions. And for the first time ever, The XPT Awards for Unique Categories. These awards are for the girls that go unnoticed , the ones who go outside the box to provide true degenerate porn fans something to fap to. Below are a few of the categories

Bottomless Gape of the Year
Miss Rosebud 2012
GILF That Don’t Make Ya Puke
Twitter’s Most Vapid Twat 2012
Prettiest Starfish
Best Use of Tears in a Sex Scene
The Tritone Award for IR Break Through Performer of the Year
Porn Blogger You Would Most Like to Hit With a Bottle Then Kick In The Teeth

and of course, the Highest Honor:

Porn Whore You Want To Chain In Your Basement

The winners of these categories well get all types of great things..Things that are so great that US laws forbid me to post them..

Nominees will be taken in the comment section of this post, later today we will start a thread at XPT and you will be able to make a nomination. We will have a cut off date and the polls will open..

This contest is brought to by Jerkules, Sponsors include Dakines Asian Escorts and Trunk Unlocking, Jigaloo’s Gaming, Hard To Find Porn, and Oriental Rugs, as well as a few others who we can’t name due to subpoenas….

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crunkleschwitz
crunkleschwitz
7 years ago

The honors will be known as the XXXPornTalk Great Achievements in Pornographic Entertainment Awards. For those into acronyms, the XPT G.A.P.E Awards. Sucking dick and greasing palms won’t help you win these awards, could help you get nominated though. The nominations will be in a cluster fuck thread on XPT. The actual voting will be done via a public poll, in a separate thread for each category, and will be open to any registered member of XXXPornTalk. Rules will be loose, but nominations will be as civil as XPT can be. The standards and critiquing will be rigorous, but you… Read more »

Imposter Foster
Imposter Foster
7 years ago

If you motherfuckers don’t give me an award then I’m going to come back to porn. The only performer who will work with me is Mr. Marcus. I don’t want to work with him for a very good reason. It’s because hes black.

wit
wit
7 years ago

i doubt marcus would work with you either, skank. he probably has more sense than that.

slutbottom chris
slutbottom chris
7 years ago

How about some love for us cuckolds? 😀

crunkleschwitz
crunkleschwitz
7 years ago

I sincerely hope that dudes will only be nominated in the Bottle to the Head, Kick to the Teeth category. If some scumbag posts a pic of a dude in the Starfish or Gape category, then Sean is going to have to ban them for a month. He should be able to figure out how to do that sometime in 2013.

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